A little weirdness eh?


Why are there always so much sadness, and not enough happiness?

I wish that the holes the pain causes inside of me could let the sadness run out of me and leave the happiness alone, because I don’t feel the pain when I’m happy, when I’m laughing and feeling great, feeling like myself again.

I used to think that when I was so down and sad that that was the real me, but now I know that I’m only me when I’m happy, but still there’s doubts, doubts that I know are wrong, but still they never disappear.

The world would be a much better place without doubts and fear, and most of all regret. All choices you make are when it all comes to all what you really wanted, and the sooner you realize that the better it is for you.  We all make mistakes, we all learn from them, maybe not at the first time or the second, but three time’s a charm right?

I always wish that this depression thing didn’t happen to me, but then I remind myself of all the great things that has come from it, like I’ve gotten to know myself better, what I should and shouldn’t do, I’ve discovered that I love to write and the best thing of it all I’ve gotten so much closer to the one person I love more than anything, and I wouldn’t change that for the world.

And I know now that I really shouldn’t drink energy drinks, it makes me hyper which is a good thing, but it also gives me back the ache inside, so no more energy drinks for me, it’s not worth it at all.

Nothing in this have really a connection to each other, but I never make much sense anyways, so why start now.

I write, that’s what I do

In that way you see my point of view

You have a look into my world, my head

But remember, everything

Can be as easily torn as a thread

A little smile means so much

A wrong word can crush

A thought can doubt

A voice can shout

So never think you’ve got me all figured out.

I’m me in several different ways

It all really depends on the days

I can be happy, I can be sad

But never always

Never forever

I can doubt, I can cry

I can smile, I can shout

But never have I been in so much doubt

Never have I seen in so many shades of gray

Each and every day something changes

Something for the better and something for the worse

I guess you can say I’ve been blessed with a curse

My heart beats for you

The only reason that remains true

All I know is that I love you

Now and until the end of time

Just a kind of poem I randomly wrote at this second and not even this is connected so I don’t know. Or maybe it is?

xx

ShadowLicious

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