( Written on my iPhone)
I havent written in ages, so I figured that I’d write a little just to let you all know that I’m still alive and doing pretty okay (:
For almost three months ago I started using Zoloft for to treat my depression and anxiety, and as far as I can tell they are working pretty well for me.
Ages ago, as many of you know, I was put on fluxotine for about six months with NO effect what so ever, so I was pretty desperate you could say.
With this medication I actually had an positive effect the second or third day, which for me is pretty amazing.
And knowing me, I just brushed it off for the reason that I just had a good period of time, so I guess you could say that I was pretty sceptical, because of how my mum and step dad’s acting when there’s talk about medication of any sort.
So after I quit fluxotine, I went a long time with no medication at all, even though I was offered to start on my current one, but I was too insecure and had so much pressure from my mum and such, so I decided not to take up on the offer. But a while later my problems got worse, suicidal thoughts and a very unstable mood and such, I got the offer again, and after a lot of discussion I found out that trying out Zoloft was the best option for me, and I don’t regret it, well not much anyway.
You see, when I’m on Zoloft I feel like I don’t have any problems, mostly.
And surely that would be a good thing, right? Yeah, I wish, but the thing is that if I feel like I dont have any issues, what do I talk about with my therapist about then? I dont want to quit having weekly sessions with her, I dont feel close to ready enough for that at all.
So I somewhat want my issues back so I can work on them, and get rid of them instead of just using the medication and just going on with my life not solving them, and then when I quit using them, it will all come back? Then I’ll be back to where I started, wont I?
You could say that I am a little lost on that matter. Sure I get a break from most of my issues, but for what good? I wont get a chance to work on them if I dont feel like I have them anymore, even though I know better.
I probably should ask my therapist about this on wednesday.
Do any of you have any opinions or something to say on this matter? I’m all ears.