Tense.


The situation is rather tense at home. It makes it almost unbearable to be downstairs anymore. My step dad is pissed, and holds a grudge forever.
Last weekend we had my niece and nephew over from Saturday to Sunday, and that was fair enough. But the day before, mum asked step dad if he was okay with having them over, and she did not get a real answer from him, so she said yes to babysit them. And that pissed him off beyond belief. And now, a week later, he’s still pissy with her. He’s like a child!
I can’t stand being around him anymore, I’m on my toes every second of the day, trying my best not to make him explode. I’m not speaking much to him at all to be honest. But if he as much tries to say something bad to me, or I feel like I’m being stepped on, I explode.
He’s always like this, and I wish that he would stop taking his bad mood out on us. I’d want nothing more than be able to kick him out for good, or move. But I can’t do either of those things, simply because my little brother, because if my step dad ever made reality if his threats, to move, my little brother would be devastated. And I can’t move out simply because its too damn expensive.
It’s not all bad at home, only 90% of the time, when he’s in a good mood. But that never lasts for long before he throws a fit over nothing.
I’m sure he would like me to respect him, but he needs to learn that to gain my respect, he needs to show me, and everyone else the respect that they deserve, and treat others better.
He’s manipulative, and if he’s in a bad mood, and some friends of his or whatever, comes to visit, he’s all smiles and sunshine. But if its my mum whose “wronged” him, he talks to his friends, and his friends only.
He’s either the silent treatment type, or raging and yelling.
If something bothers him, he doesn’t say it straight away, he keeps building up his irritation, and when we least expect it, he blows up.

It may not sound so bad to you guys out there, but it’s taking its toll on not only me, but my mum as well, mentally. The way he keeps me constantly on my toes is really triggering my anxiety. And I’m so sick of it.

I hate how love makes you just accept things, and turn blind. I want him out, and I want it now. We’d be better off without him.
But there’s nothing I can do but endure it the best I can.

Probably a confusing post yet again, but I’m in a confused mood, so it affects my writing greatly.

I am the type to insert my feelings into what I write, and hopefully that will make people more aware of the feelings related to this post.

To all women and men out there, don’t let your better half or anyone else step on you!
Nothing pisses me off more than to be stepped on, or watching others be treated like that.

Stand up for yourself!!!

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