Never good enough

No matter what I say, how much I share, how much I try to help.

Its just never enough. Doesnt even get recognized as an attempt even.

I dont know how much longer he can expect me to do this.

I’m close to having had enough. I just want to get out of here. To be just me for a while.

Somewhere I dont have to worry about wether I’m good enough or not. If I talk, It’ll be ok, and if I don’t, thats perfectly fine too.

The saying ´treat other people the way you want to be treated´ is shit, because no one will ever put in the slightest of effort unless they gain something from it. Selflessness is rare nowadays.  So is genuinly caring as well.

Post partrum depression. There, I said it.

I’ve been like this for 11 months.

Depressed. Angry. Sad. Numb. All at once, every day.

How much longer am I supposed to deal with this alone?

I tried asking for help. Again and again. All I get in return is anger and frustration. And guilt.

So what’s the point??

I’m not good enough when I’m me. I’m not good enough when I’m talking, crying, screaming. What do they want??

I can’t take this for much longer..


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